presidential task force

University Establishes Tusk Force to Buy a Bunch of Really Cool Elephants

Nooz Staff2 months ago2 months ago01 mins

DAY HALL—Interim President Michael Kotlikoff has announced the formation of a new tusk force to study the possibility of buying some super awesome elephants. According to a campus-wide email sent earlier today, the Presidential Tusk Force to Explore the Purchase of a Bunch of Really Cool Elephants was created to “examine critical questions concerning how…

Martha Pollack Curls Up With Campus Climate Surveys To Read Before Bedtime

Nooz Staff7 years ago7 years ago02 mins

DAY HALL— Slipping on her Cornell-branded flannel PJs, President Martha Pollack snuggled under the covers and opened up the results of the Campus Climate Surveys for her nightly bedtime story. After urging every single one of Cornell’s almost 15,000 students to take the survey, President Pollack eagerly read all twelve responses while sipping a warm…

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presidential task force

University Establishes Tusk Force to Buy a Bunch of Really Cool Elephants

Martha Pollack Curls Up With Campus Climate Surveys To Read Before Bedtime