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Friday, October 23, 2026
Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants
Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper
“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat
Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup
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Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants
Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper
“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat
Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Vote of No Continence? Kotlikoff Shits Pants

11 hours ago11 hours ago

Uris Hall Excited to Announce New 0 Ply Toilet Paper

11 hours ago11 hours ago

“I’ll See You In Court”: Student Mistakes CKB Resident’s Invitation As Legal Threat

1 day ago1 day ago

Morrison Stir-Fry Station Switches to Cup & Ball Scam for Food Pickup

2 days ago2 days ago

Cornell President Warns Replacing President Would Harm Cornell, Cornell President

2 days ago2 days ago

Halloween Enthusiast Disappointed by Ithaca Wine & Spirits

6 days ago6 days ago

Throbbing Hangover Headache Met With 7:45 A.M. Clocktower Rendition of “Here Comes The Sun”

1 week ago1 week ago

“You Know, Too Much Sleep Is Actually Bad For You,” Student Tells Person-Shaped Bush

1 week ago1 week ago

“Yeah I Was in the Hood,” Says Rich White Biology Student Misleadingly Talking About Fume Hood

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago

Inconsiderate Asshole With No Concept of Personal Space Sits Within 5 Seats of You in Lecture Hall

2 weeks ago2 weeks ago
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  • 2

October 2, 2026

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Splitsies! Group Assignment Done By Just You

Nooz Staff3 weeks ago3 weeks ago01 mins

BETHE HOUSE—On the laptop of sophomore Katie Maxwell ’29, a frantic scene emerged. Last Thursday, she had been assigned a random partner to work on a group assignment, but she had not yet heard from him, nary a word nor a sound. First contact with William Hopkins ’29 was reached at 8:34 PM, approximately three…

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  • Administration
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CUPD Claims K-9 Ate Report

Nooz Staff3 weeks ago3 weeks ago02 mins

BARTON HALL—Accused of omitting key details from Jane Doe’s testimony in the report they provided to the Tompkins County District Attorney, the Cornell University Police Department told the press Friday morning that parts of the document had simply been consumed by one of the force’s K-9 units. On November 25, 2024, CUPD supplied the DA’s…

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