Kotlikoff Also Wondering What Action Cornell Administration Will Take

GREEN SCREEN—In a Saturday video statement, university president Michael Kotlikoff spoke directly to the Cornell community, informing them that he was just as curious as they were about how his administration intends to address sexual violence.

“I want to acknowledge something that can be difficult for an institution to say: we don’t have all the answers,” Kotlikoff said, admitting that he had skimmed the readings on governance and disciplinary procedure and felt unprepared to contribute to the discussion.

The video, released nearly two weeks after the University’s first statement on the Jane Doe lawsuit, emphasized the importance of institutional change, which Kotlikoff promised would be carried out by some sort of authority figure at some point.

“Unfortunately, due to legal and privacy concerns, recording this video is the greatest action I can take within the scope of my power,” explained Kotlikoff apologetically. “There’s just not a lot a president can do about the policies that govern his institution.”

The statement also addressed concerns about the university’s lack of transparency in its handling of the case. “To those frustrated about being left in the dark: I know how you feel,” said Kotlikoff. “I’m so in the dark, I didn’t even know we still had a Title IX office. I thought we purged all the DEI stuff.”

In his concluding remarks, Kotlikoff promised to continue providing the Cornell community with the support it truly needs: solemn gazes and hyperlinked F.A.Q. pages.