DOWNTOWN ITHACA— Last weekend, we sat down with Hannah Davis ‘26, Editor-in-Chief of The Cornell Daily Rain Sleet Hail Snow. Yes, that’s right. The Cornell Daily Sun has been renamed to The Cornell Daily Rain Sleet Hail Snow. When asked what moment inspired her to advocate for the name change, Davis ‘26 responded, “My English…
CRADIT FARM DRIVE—Since the start of the semester, students across campus have been terrorized by remorseless, bloodthirsty, and cruel individuals: E-Scooter riders. No roadway or path is safe from them. Last Thursday, Gloria Alvarado ‘28 was the latest victim. After a long day of being manhandled by chemistry homework, Alvarado was walking back to her…
COOK HOUSE—Last night, after an hour or so of tossing and turning, Noelle Keyes ‘28 got out of bed to turn the thermostat down, only to find that her roommate, ልጎጮቹቹ ርዐረዪጎጋፏቹ ’28 of El Infierno, California, had set the temperature to a toasty 1,500 degrees Fahrenheit. Although she turned it down to a more…
What do you mean? Stalking your crush through your club’s Instagram account is normal and healthy. Love requires sacrifice. That’s why, when I initially needed to find his Instagram, I went through the club account’s followers until I found the person I saw him eating with once through my binoculars. From there, it was pretty…
MORRISON DINING— Representatives of UN-Water, the coordination agency that manages global water accessibility, announced a new initiative on Monday to bring clean drinking water to Morrison Dining. “I’ve been parched for the past 45 goddamn minutes,” lamented UN representative Keefe Saunders, wandering around Morrison like a bumbling toddler trying to find a water dispenser. “They’re…
ARTS QUAD—Following a weekend of Halloween festivities, Sean Kenneth ‘28 was found Monday sporting a short-sleeve shirt in 55°F weather and white Cayuga Medical Center ID bracelet. “Oh, this?” he was reported to have said repeatedly throughout the day. “It’s a long story, actually it’s pretty crazy. But it’s nothing bro, like seriously don’t worry…
MORRISON HALL—Late at night, many students will use “instant foods” to fuel themselves during their long stretches of studious work. But this semester, residents at Morrison Hall have been trying a new brand of instant ramen for anything but their studies. “Usually when I’m trying to be a nuisance and wake up my neighbors, I…
NORTH CAMPUS—Halloween is quickly approaching, and friend groups are getting together their last-minute group costumes. Among one group of friends, the selection process is exceedingly contentious, with each girl vying for their favorite character. However, Zara Saunders ‘28, the only minority in her friend group, already knows who she’s going to be. This year, Saunders…
URIS LIBRARY—Despite increasingly unsubtle attempts to temper expectations for an upcoming group presentation, straight-A classmate Ava Hoffman ‘28 still hasn’t taken the fucking hint. “I don’t think this is going to be graded too harshly,” said Gavin Wu ‘27, who knew he was completely fucked when Hoffman created a group chat three weeks before the…
OLIN LIBRARY—Every day, hundreds of students hunker down in the Olin stacks, growing increasingly discouraged as their study sessions drag on. Etched into the Olin desks, however, are the few things that keep struggling students going: motivational messages meant to inspire. Such messages show students that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel,…
