BARTELS HALL—Alexander Pope ‘28, a self-identified social climber, is turning heads at Lindseth Climbing Center with his friendly demeanor. “Climbing is better with buddies!” remarked the beaming sophomore transfer, dusting his chalky hands on a pair of well-worn sweatpants. “I’ve been climbing since the fourth grade, and the thing that always keeps me coming back…
DAY HALL—In a rare demonstration of vulnerability, President Martha Pollack opened up to students with an emotional request this Friday morning: “My phone is almost dead, does anyone have a charger I can borrow for like half an hour?” “I forgot my charger in my city office. I know what you’re thinking, ‘classic sloppy Martha,…
LEWIS AUDITORIUM — Just barely putting his notes away in time before the TA handed out the midterm, Justin Solotoff ’17 dismissed his neighbor’s assertive comment that Solotoff should have started studying earlier for the exam. “I didn’t cram,” whispered Solotoff as he opened his blue book. “I started studying a whole hour ago.” Solotoff’s…
HO PLAZA – A march for white civil rights and recognition, organized by the Union of White Cornell Students, occurred on Ho Plaza today, however it was largely unnoticed due to the march being nearly indistinguishable from the normal pedestrian traffic of students on campus. “That march was today? I was out here giving out…
As the Covid-19 pandemic continues to evolve, Cornell has once again revised its health and safety guidelines for students. Feeling confused about when and where you should wear a mask? Fear not—CU Nooz is here to help! 1. Masks are not required for any student who has achieved Dean’s List in at least two semesters,…
There are two things in this world I love: drinking a nice pint of Guinness and giving the bird to the Republic of Ireland. So, when a friend of mine informed me that every time I slam back a brewski in a plastic four-leaf clover glass today I am disrespecting Irish culture, I did a…
BARTELS HALL—The success of the redemption prom last Saturday has inspired Class Councils to host yet another beloved high school experience lost to the pandemic: the FitnessGram Pacer Test. “The Pacer,” a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues, will take place in Newman Arena at 6 AM the morning…
COLLEGETOWN- College of Human Ecology sophomore Sandra Owings reported did literally “nothing” during this past weekend’s February Break. “I mostly just sat around, didn’t do any work or go out or anything,” said the Human Development major who remained sprawled out on the couch in her Collegetown apartment having not left that position since 1:30…
ITHACA- Thousands of Cornell students and faculty spend yesterday with their loved ones, in order to commemorate events involving a man who was on a boat a very long time ago. All courses were cancelled, and most students’ parents were allowed to take off from work as well. Administration spokesperson Patricia Stevens explained that, “The…
The University just announced a sweeping change that allows male and female students to room together on West Campus, which means I will finally be able to make female friends. The change comes after years of maintaining an archaic policy built upon the misguided preconception that boys and girls can only be enemies or lovers,…
