ITHACA, NY—While walking up the slope from her dorm on West Campus last Wednesday, Michelle Boyer ’16 could not help but notice the frigid temperatures and grey weather surrounding her. Despite this climate being quite normal for the region, and this already being her second year on The Hill, Boyer remained puzzled by what she…
HOLLISTER HALL – Engineering professor Edward McTiernan was observed wearing a wristwatch while teaching his embedded systems lecture Monday morning, seemingly oblivious to the fact that there are clocks almost everywhere on this college campus. “When I saw Dr. McTiernan with a watch, I was pretty confused, considering there are at least three clocks in…
LIBE SLOPE—Among the thousands of enthusiastic attendees ready to partake in the Slope Day festivities is Daniel Sebastian ‘22, whose only motivation for showing up is the wholesome and thorough consumption of music. “You don’t need drugs or alcohol to enjoy EDM, especially not during the daytime,” said Sebastian. “I can’t wait to sing all…
RAND HALL—After her third all-nighter this week and upon learning that her major lost to Chemical Engineering in the Major Cornell Major Tournament, Sharon Yang, Architecture ‘20, let out a primal scream, impulsively grabbed the nearest pair of scissors, and cut off her right braid. “Dragon dragon dragon! Oy oy OY!” Yang shouted to no…
BUILDER BASE—In what would appear to be the second clan-related controversy of his tenure, Interim President Michael Kotlikoff announced Thursday that the Cornell administration would NOT be gemming McGraw Tower’s level 10 upgrade. “I understand students’ frustration,” said Kotlikoff. “McGraw Tower is an iconic landmark, and these upgrade times are disheartening. However, I would remind…
ITHACA, NY – University health officials have reportedly expressed concern over a new trend known as “binge-watching.” “We’ve noticed a troubling rise in high television intake going on recently at the university,” said Gannett Executive Director and Performing and Media Arts Professor Ellen Phelps. “This kind of behavior can lead to all kinds of physical…
SCHOELLKOPF FIELD— Due to some technical difficulties within the lighting department, the University’s annual homecoming weekend celebrations were kicked off with a 30 minute display of a Windows screen saver. “I stepped away from my computer to grab a hot dog for what I thought would be no more than five minutes,” said laser show…
BARTON HALL–Clubfest was evacuated Sunday after the Fire Juggling Club’s live demonstration sent a wayward torch into a hands-on display for the Big Piles of Straw Club, who occupied the neighboring booth. CUPD had their hands full containing several unrelated blazes in North Campus residence halls and were therefore unable to respond to the scene….
In a move widely seen as “misleading” and “unfair” by students and faculty across the Cornell community, the administration announced Friday that Cornell’s Campus to Campus bus would not be adding a stop at the Cornell Medical School in Qatar. “If you’re going to call it a campus to campus bus,” Joe Armisen ‘14 noted,…
MANN LIBRARY- Students across campus have been hard at work preparing for the upcoming prelim in GOVT 4330: Intro to ‘House of Cards,’ oftentimes spending many consecutive hours watching the most recent season of the Netflix original drama. “I’ve been so busy this week with all my classes. I had to watch six episodes of…
