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May 13, 2026
  • Cornell Christian Club Turns Rain into Wine Tour
  • Kotlikoff Carefully Maneuvers Around Key Detail at Day Hall Incident
  • “I Overcame a Lot of Diversity to be Here,” Says White Dude in Discussion Section
  • Student Accused of Using AI Forced to Defend Worst Discussion Post Ever
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OP-ED: I Finally Got Drunk Enough to Carry The Fwuffy Wuffy Skunk Back to My Dorm

Nooz Staff5 years ago04 mins

I had just begun the godforsaken journey up Eddy street back toward North Campus, my arms slung over the shoulders of my marginally less drunk friends and my feet dragging uselessly behind, when I noticed what appeared to be a Club Penguin puffle waddling beside us in the brush.  “Boys, boys,” I whispered, “You see…

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