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Friday, September 11, 2026
Mama’s Cleverest Boy Stumped by Strange Clothes-Washing Machine
Cornell Republican Sheds Red Nose and Polka Dot Romper, Slinks into Suit for Rare ClubFest Metamorphosis
English Department Receives $12 Grant
Level B ‘Underage Tuesdays’ Sees Commercial Success, Legal Ramifications
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Mama’s Cleverest Boy Stumped by Strange Clothes-Washing Machine
Cornell Republican Sheds Red Nose and Polka Dot Romper, Slinks into Suit for Rare ClubFest Metamorphosis
English Department Receives $12 Grant
Level B ‘Underage Tuesdays’ Sees Commercial Success, Legal Ramifications
CU Nooz

CU Nooz

Random Nooz
  • About
  • Disclaimer
  • Write for Us
  • Advertising with CU Nooz
  • CU NoozMagazine
    • Spring 2026 Issue
    • Spring 2025 Issue
  • Podcasts
    • CU Interviooz
Headlines

Mama’s Cleverest Boy Stumped by Strange Clothes-Washing Machine

1 day ago1 day ago

Cornell Republican Sheds Red Nose and Polka Dot Romper, Slinks into Suit for Rare ClubFest Metamorphosis

2 days ago2 days ago

English Department Receives $12 Grant

2 days ago2 days ago

Level B ‘Underage Tuesdays’ Sees Commercial Success, Legal Ramifications

3 days ago3 days ago

Birder Actually Not Sure About That One

3 days ago3 days ago

Professor Spices Up Syllabus With Jokes Like “Attendance is Mandatory”

1 week ago2 days ago

Outfit Shabby Enough to Do Work in Math Library Today

1 week ago1 week ago

Super Seniors Devastated to Learn of “No Game” in Freshman Dorms

1 week ago1 week ago

Worst Guy You Know Looking For Manic Pixie Tylenol Users

12 months ago12 months ago

Wasian Student Association To Host Mixer

12 months ago7 months ago
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  • Meal Plan

Meal Plan

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Oliver Twist? Student Must Picketh a Pocket to Afford a Zeus Latte

Nooz Staff3 years ago3 years ago02 mins

TEMPLE OF ZEUS—’Twas a day most ordinary in the most extravagant food shoppe in Ithaca: Doth Great Temple of Zeus. For Junior Owen Sowerberry ’25, the price to feed a troublesome caffeine addiction was damn near impossible. Upon the realization that he had spent his last pittance to wash his ragged work clothes, Sowerberry realized…

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  • Uncategorized

Student Returning Home Disappointed By Meal Plan Options

Nooz Staff6 years ago1 year ago02 mins

STATEN ISLAND—Longing for a time with better company and better food, Alex Reed ’24 has been missing Cornell Dining’s exquisite meal selections while back at his parents’ house for Winter Break.  “It’s nice to not have to wait in line at the dining hall—sorry, dining room,” Reed said. “But overall, there just hasn’t been the…

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  • Cornell

Cornell Dining Introduces New “All We Allow You to Eat” Meal Plan

Nooz Staff11 years ago02 mins

BECKER DINING HALL — In a new move to encourage the naughty children not to eat in a most rapacious manner, Cornell Dining will begin the new “All We Allow You to Eat” meal plan this semester. Under the restrictive dining option, only one bowl of gruel shall be appropriated to each boy and girl,…

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