SCHOELLKOPF —With thousands of students and alumni on campus to celebrate Homecoming weekend, football fans were disappointed on Saturday as Cornell was defeated 31-14 by musicians Grace Potter and Icona Pop.
“I’m very proud of my boys, but we all knew it was going to be rough going up against an indie singer and a Swedish DJ duo, and we simply were the worse team today,” stated Cornell football coach David Archer ’05, who had tried to softly lower his players’ expectations before the Homecoming game which seemed to be mismatched from the start.
“I’ll be honest, I’m a pretty big Icona Pop fan. ‘I Don’t Care’ is just so catchy! But yeah, those girls really destroyed us out there. You just can’t win football games when a 31-year old Grace Potter is marauding around the field, brutally tackling all of your players,” continued Archer.
Coach Archer was later seen telling his team to forget about the loss, and think back to more positive times such as last year’s Homecoming game when they defeated long-time rival Ke$ha.