Linguistics – CU Nooz

Headlines

OP-ED: You And I Both Know Our Construction Team Can’t Handle Building A Pathway In Ezra’s Tunnel
7 years ago7 years ago
Student Who Bleeds Big Red Sadly Returns Latest Nike Shoes
7 years ago
Report: Holy Shit, It’s Wednesday
7 years ago7 years ago
Student at Summer Internship Drops Fourth Hint of Day That He Goes to Cornell
8 years ago
Professors Notice Increase in Student Motivation To Be the Very Best, Like No One Ever Was
8 years ago8 years ago
Report: 10:10 Lecture Fills Up Too Quickly and Oh Boo Hoo You Sad Fucks
8 years ago8 years ago

“Beep Boop Beep,” Sentient Robot Only Speaks Robot

Nooz Staff2 months ago2 months ago03 mins

PHILLIPS HALL—As artificial intelligence advances at breakneck pace, the race to create a truly sentient digital being, capable of thinking, working, and irreversibly blurring the line between man and machine, has rapidly approached its conclusion. Surprising everyone, a group of Cornell engineers has managed to create the first fully sentient automaton, which they call Robot…

Humanities Not Dead, Just Sleeping

Nooz Staff5 years ago02 mins

GOLDWIN SMITH HALL—Despite the rumors that the humanities are dead, faculty and students at Cornell firmly believe that they are, in fact, only sleeping. “It’s only natural that the humanities would need a break,” explained Art History Professor Nick Chen. “They mattered for thousands of years, and a discipline can’t go on mattering like that…