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Headlines

Guy Who Spent All Semester Watching 2x Speed Lecture Recordings Just Talks Like That Now
5 days ago5 days ago
Flo Rida Gets Spun Right Round Baby Right Round Trying to Find Way Out of ILR Building
6 days ago6 days ago
“GET ON THE GROUND AND BEG LIKE THE DOG YOU ARE!” Most Merciful Chem Professor Grants Extra Credit Opportunity
2 weeks ago
Cornell Football Player Drafted to NFL Proves that Coaches Should Be Tested for Brain Damage Too
2 weeks ago
“Does Your Mother Cry Because Her Daughter Is An Idiot?” Chem TA Compliments Curious Review Session Attendee
12 months ago12 months ago
“There’s a Day Hall?” Asks a Confused Martha Pollack Wandering Onto Campus for the Third Time This Year
12 months ago12 months ago

OP-ED: That Guy You’re Hooking Up With Is Actually Really Ugly

Nooz Staff3 years ago03 mins

Hey queen! Can we have a little chat, just you and me? I am coming to you as a nameless, faceless concerned individual who is definitely not your best friend because nothing else seems to be getting through to you up to this point. I know the pandemic has been tough on all of us,…

Honoring Black History Month, Professor Pledges to Continue Using Blackboard This Semester

Nooz Staff5 years ago5 years ago02 mins

ROCKEFELLER HALL—In an effort to show solidarity with his Black students during Black History Month, Anthropology Professor Bradley Haynes announced that he will refuse to switch from Blackboard to Canvas this semester. While many professors are not opting to switch platforms until Spring 2020, Professor Haynes said his choice will show students that he is…