August 22, 2017

Professor Hopes Poor First Impression With Student Won’t Ruin Semester

BAKER LAB—After being caught off guard in an awkward interaction with a member of his 8 AM class, chemistry professor Lee Wilf reportedly hoped that his poor first impression wouldn’t ruin the rest of his semester.

“It was 15 minutes before my class started, so I really wasn’t expecting anyone to come into the lecture hall,” the flustered academic explained as he tried to recount how that brief exchange went awry so quickly. “I had just put down my iced coffee but I don’t think my student saw, so when she shook my wet hand she probably thought I was sweating or something.”

Professor Wilf recalled hastily pulling his hand away and fumbling around for a syllabus as the student waited to know which edition of the textbook would be best.

“I already emailed the syllabus last night, I don’t know what I was thinking, I’m such an idiot,” the 55-year-old man with two doctorates quietly scolded to himself. “She’ll probably rate me poorly or describe me as ‘disorganized’ on Rate My Professors.”

Sources confirmed that the tenured instructor spent the next several minutes planning how to salvage his image over the course of the semester, as the student walked away congratulating herself for successfully networking with a potential recommender.

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