Yippee! New Sneaky Link Text: G-893496 Is Your Google Verification Code

Why, you should be absolutely chuffed to bits! Your sneaky link has given you a new steamy confirmation of their desires for you in the form of a SMS message: “G-893496 is your Google verification code.” 

You know it is them. It just has to be them. They have tried to obscure their identity from you by texting, from a burner phone, a number of only six digits, but you are smart enough to know that this is all a part of the game. They put their hair behind their ears twice during this last lecture – a small hint to you that something great, something satisfying, was approaching your inbox. You drool at the sneakiness of the provocation. It makes it feel so wrong, but to you, that makes it so right.

However, its contents puzzle you – what could it possibly mean? It appears to be some sort of “code.” A riddle, perhaps? Others could see this as quite a perplexing method to reel you in as a potential mate. But you are different. You revel in the opportunity to prove your dedication to work for the final prize. In fact, it excites you. That sly little devil… They know how much I love a challenge of wit, you think to yourself. 

You tremble as you work to decipher the invitation. Are there any clues? Maybe the numbers are the first of an address to meet at for a sexy rendezvous. No, they love the chase; that must be a red herring to tease you with. It has to be something more meaningful. Something deeper. Hmm… “G”… gguh…gah… goo…goooo…goo- Aha! Google! A hidden clue! They must be pulling you to do research on decoding to reveal their message. They want you to put in the grueling effort that makes you sweat. That tricky minx! 

Your heart races as you break out your laptop and attempt to open your desired search engine. You’re logged out. That’s unusual. But you think nothing of it, punching in your credentials and satisfying the two-factor authentication. The screen that follows makes you hold your breath. There is a problem.

“Please enter the Google verification code sent via text message to ***-***-9803 to confirm your identity.” 

Fuck. FUCK! How must you fulfill their needs without various popular decoding websites at your fingertips via Google? Was this their doing? Did they lead you on only to find pleasure in denying you, like they’ve done in the past? No, it can’t be. They want you to feel this frustration, but you know that you can figure it out.

You rack your brain for answers. You enter 053100 – their birthday. Wrong. As you feel the exasperation bubbling in your stomach, it comes to you. The numbers. You type in G-893496. The page reloads to the Google homepage. 

You’re in. Never has a search bar made you so horny.

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