BEBE LAKE—As winter approaches, many creatures encounter difficulty securing a mate for the season—Cornell students included. A new study from the Cornell Behavioral Ecology Department investigated the mate-seeking strategy of the highly elusive (and highly exclusive) Spoiled bratae, colloquially known as rich students. “I was thrilled to be invited to Cornell to complete my research…
COLLEGETOWN—In a public broadcast delivered via megaphone from the roof of Ithaca Renting Company, representatives of the Lambrou, Avramis, and O’Connor apartments announced their stunning support for a Collegetown rent freeze, after coming to the realization that “We are all tenants on this beautiful planet called Earth.” “We have, all of us, been led astray…
CITY HALL – This morning, during a brief conference with the local press, Ithaca officials revealed that Svante Myrick has started noticing changes in his body, voice, and temperament which, they stressed, are entirely natural and normal for someone his age. Myrick, one of the youngest mayors in US history, seemed concerned yet optimistic at…
