October 7, 2013

Shutdown Coverage: IPod and Guitar Amp Replace Clock Tower Bells

Due to nonessential labor and upkeep costs, Cornell’s famous chimes have been removed from the clock tower. President Skorton refuses to let the campus go without music, however, telling CUNooz: “I asked my 16-year-old nephew Colin if he had anything to play music on. He said I could use his old ‘amp’, as he just bought a new one for his band with his birthday money.”

Skorton’s secretary, Allie Goldstein, has been assigned the task of compiling a playlist of acceptable music. When questioned, Goldstein promised that the music on deck for play will not deviate from the tunes the Cornell community has grown to love: “I have a couple different bell noises from Youtube to play on the hour. Of course, the main focus has been on getting pop songs from 6 months ago and royalty-free Christmas songs.”

Skorton advises students and faculty to keep an ear out for the change later this week.

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