Cornell to Begin Construction on $100 Million New Gorge Connecting Fall Creek and Cascadilla

BAKER ARCH—This morning President Martha Pollack announced that the University will begin immediate construction on an ambitious $100 million gorge which will connect Fall Creek to Cascadilla.

“While I understand that some students may want these millions of dollars to go to our underfunded mental health services or our critical lack of housing,” said President Pollack, “it strikes me as deeply unfair that students who live on North Campus and in Collegetown get to see a beautiful gorge on their walk to campus while those on West have to trudge up the slope every day without a single gorge in sight.”

Becker House resident Keiren Frankson ‘21 was extremely excited about the idea. “I was just talking to my mom about how I never see the gorges because I live on West Campus,” she said while wearing an “Ithaca is Gorges” sweatshirt. “Sure, my roommate was crying earlier because her financial aid got reduced to help fund the new gorge, but the view is gonna be amazing!”

Chief of Police Kathy Zoner also wholeheartedly endorsed the move, stating that the campus would now be “far more easily fortifiable on three out of four sides.”

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