Motel School Opens for Low-Achieving Hotel Students

STATLER HALL — Students in the School of Hotel Administration with a GPA lower than 2.0 will be moved into a less intensive motel management track, administrators announced Thursday. The new program, intended to train those interested in the hospitality industry who need a more low-key training system, is already receiving criticism from current hotel students.

“I fucking hate motelies,” said hotel student Benjamin Joseph ‘16. “They don’t even fold napkins. They just sit at the front desk of the Super 8. Motelies do no work.”

As Cornell’s hospitality program is one of the most intensive training programs in the world, many students find themselves falling behind. Those who show a lack of proficiency in several high-end aspects of the hotel management major, such as wine-tasting and restaurant management, may wish to concentrate in a field that requires none of these skills.

“The Econolodge School of Motel Administration is specifically catered to those students that have an empty, soulless personality to them,” commented Richard Adie, General Manager of the Statler Hotel. “They also are the same people who hotel guests may not want to look at for whatever reason.”

The new program will feature courses in, among others, fixing neon road signs and not telling the police which guests are the serial killers.

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