November 29, 2016

Asshole Professor Assigns Reading When All the Other Shit Is Due

GOLDWIN SMITH HALL – In what is sure to be received as a total dick move by his Earth Science students, asshole Professor Robert Simpson assigned a ninety-page reading for Monday when all everyone’s other shit is due.

“This guy’s a total shithead,” said Peter Clegg ‘17, turning two pages without looking at the reading, “doesn’t he realize I have a prelim on Monday? What a piss-guzzling rat of a person.”

Professor Simpson is such an asswipe that he seems unaware that his class is just a requirement-filling time-suck, and he’s actually entertaining the dipshit idea that he should try to teach something to his students.

“I think this important reading will completely change the way my students think about rocks,” said the masochistic fuck, excited about the additional stress he was inflicting upon his students.

“Man, fuck that guy,” reported the class.

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