OP-ED: If Perfect Match Says I’m Meant To Date Only Freshman Women, Then Who Am I To Question It?

As advanced AI systems become increasingly ingrained within our world, aiding in everything from Spotify recommendations to software engineering, and now matchmaking, I propose that we turn yet another tricky puzzle over to our new robot pals: morality. How old is too old? How young is too young? These complex and multifaceted issues have plagued our campus for far too long. Why not just let the machines pick?

Now I’m not saying that I should hike up to North Campus to procure some random Freshman girl from the middle of Rawlings Green and ask her out. Of course not! That would be gauche. Boorish. Impolite. What I am saying is that if I happen to select a Perfect Match age range of 18-19 years old, what have I truly done wrong?

If the wise algorithm should say that I am not a fit match for any of the women within such a range, then so be it. A fair and reasonable determination. 

BUT, if the algorithm should happen to pair me with several Balch Hall residents who didn’t think very hard about what setting their own age maximums to 26 actually meant, are we not meant to be? It is called Perfect Match, after all!

While generations of learning and discussion have led to the modern understanding that it is uncouth for an enterprising grad student to date first-years, all that time plus a few extra years has produced Machine Learning Algorithms. And if this algorithm, the sum of all human accomplishment up until this moment, gives me the green light, then how can I, how can anyone, disagree?

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