Senior Plays Around with Scheduler Just to See Pretty Colors, Shapes

URIS LIBRARY—Scheduler’s latest update never fails to excite Ethan Weiss ‘23.

“Ever since I was a freshman, I’ve looked forward to the release of the next version of Scheduler,” said Weiss, double major in art and geometry. “Sure, it’s technically available all year, but there’s nothing like getting your hands on a fresh slate of classes.”

His enthusiasm has confused some fellow library patrons.

“That guy’s a senior?” said Katie Jefferson ‘24. “He’s had Scheduler up for hours! His schedule’s bonkers, too. I figured he was a prefrosh that got left behind on a tour and decided to start planning his future.”

The judgment of his peers has not seemed to faze Weiss.

“My schedule? I don’t care about my schedule,” he said. “I care about my dear, dear Scheduler. HIST? PHIL? Who’s that? All that matters to me is how nicely they fit together, the contrast of their beautiful colors, the positioning of the boxes.”

At press time, Weiss has received notice that eight semesters’ schedules based entirely upon aesthetic pleasure do not, in fact, satisfy any distribution requirements and he will not be graduating this year.

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