OP-ED: If “Studying for the MCAT” Were So Important, You Wouldn’t Be Doing It Where I’m Playing Poptropica With No Headphones on in the Library 

OLIN LIBRARY—I’ll say it. I am sick and tired of these so-called STEM majors complaining about their fucking “prelims”, “research,” and the “general horror that is being pre-med.” Quite frankly, if “studying for the MCAT” were so important, you wouldn’t be interrupting my (very much needed) afternoon public Poptropica session.

As I was sitting on the first floor of Olin Library, it became clear to me that our future doctors don’t even care about their studies. I was embarking on the elementary quest of 24 Carrot Island, a spiritual journey that cannot be confined to airpods. Soon, the student beside me completely abandoned what they were doing. Instead of paying attention to the essential foundations of biochemistry, they were glaring at my screen. 

If Poptropica was such a distraction for them, they should have never gone to the library in the first place. Guess evil rabbits are more important than eradicating cancer, huh?

Worse, once I cranked the volume up to watch the walkthrough video, they started clearing their throat, probably an indication of some sort of infectious disease. This was troubling. What kind of doctor can’t even take care of themselves? WAKE UP PEOPLE! You want these degenerates treating your children?

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